Sucker Punch


Patience isn’t really my virtue! When I make up my mind to do something, I charge full speed ahead, like a steam train without brakes! I don’t often let reason, balance and common sense slow me down, and beware if you get in my way with some well-intended (and often correct) advice. I guess you could say I am very determined and focused when I’m in the zone – I can go from zero to 100 in an instant, sometimes faster, leaving those in my trail scratching their heads and wondering what just hit them. I’ve always chosen to see this as a positive character trait however, it has landed me regularly in hot water and has been a fantastic lesson facilitator. So, I’m giving gratitude for my determination and welcome the lessons in grace.

With this in mind, you can imagine what went down when I read the draft of The Law of Creation for the first time. It resonated with me immediately and before finishing the book I was already applying the laws with a lot of success. I went from considering a family suicide pact to loving the whole world in what seemed like a moment. I was floating on a cloud I was so happy. Our garden began to respond, as if the flowers were blooming just for my pleasure. Strangers were kind and smiled at me for no reason. Every day was a delight. Nothing happened to upset the apple cart. Absolutely nothing. No clumsy incidences, no near misses, no rain on my parade. It was utter bliss. I began to think I had this ‘vibrate with love, and joy’ thing down pat!

I was meditating daily, I was completing a 21 day reprogram of the brain, each day I was saying my affirmations, which are posted up all over the house, I was creating vision boards, I was visualizing with enthused emotion, and everything just fit into place. And then, guess what happened? I began to question it all. Seriously, who questions perfection? I found myself wanting a little something to test my new re-membered powers. A little something to confirm I had this licked. I even mentioned this to my daughter, that I wanted to test my power. And boy, did the Universe deliver a whole load of testing. I didn’t see it coming and it knocked me right off my feet with a big fat slap up across my head!

In my passion to help others learn The Law of Creation, I decided to start a Manifestation Book Club with my family. During my meditations, I visualized myself passing on information in a loving and joyful manner. I visualized the recipients openly receiving the information that resonated with them. I visualized a beautiful evening of like-minded people sharing amazing information and stories. I visualized us all being uplifted and harnessing our understanding of The Law of Creation and our manifesting powers.

In reality: my daughter told me I was lecturing and boring! Boy, that did not go down like I had planned or visualized. I went directly, in true Tracy form, from a level of Joy (level 540 on the Power versus Force by David Hawkins emotional scale) to one of shame (level 20) and guilt (level 30). Even while this process took place, I knew that I was in control of my reaction and I could choose to react in a different way. Unfortunately, nothing saved me in the moment. I did manage to change course slightly and end the evening with us all feeling uplifted and having learned something, but went to bed with thoughts of: What was I thinking trying to pull this off? If my daughter doesn’t even want to hear what I say, how can I expect anyone else will? Who am I to try help others? What do I know? How can one incident knock me off course so easily and so far off course? I am a sham! I’m a fool! I’m so embarrassed! Just give up now so you won’t get hurt like this again!

After many tears and a good discussion with my husband, I managed to turn it all around the following morning. I wanted to achieve from the evening a few aha moments for each one of us. This happened, just not in the format I had imagined. I wanted us all to grow from the experience. This happened – especially for me. One of my current affirmations is “In helping others create the life they desire; I also help myself.” I may rewrite this affirmation. Just kidding. In retrospect, the evening was a success. I am climbing back up the emotional scale, back up to Joy. First, I got angry. Anger is at a level of 150 – way higher than where I was. I got angry at my husband – poor man, I took it out on him and had to apologize. Then from anger, I jumped to Courage, level 200, and wrote this article. From there onto Acceptance, level 350. I accepted that I had received just what I had asked for – something to test my powers. I accepted that the book club evening accomplished what I had wanted it to. I accepted that I do have something to offer the world and I accepted that I am using The Law of Creation with skill and ease. Love, level 500, is not far from Acceptance. To get to Love, I found what I have to be grateful for. I’m grateful my daughter challenged my powers so that I could master them. I’m grateful for the aha moments we all had. I’m grateful for my husband who is always there when I need him. I’m grateful for his advice because it is always on point. I’m grateful to learn grace! I’m grateful for the whole process and I’m grateful I can share this with you.

So, thank you for allowing me to share. I am grateful for you. Here’s to us all creating a permanent state of positivity!

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